


five times Jillian Holtzmann asks Erin Gilbert to marry her and the one time she actually does

by getwiigywithit



Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: AU, Bar, Childhood, College, F/F, Fluff, Light Angst, Marriage, Middle School, More Tags as I update, Pre-teens - Freeform, Science Nerds, slowburn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-03
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:20:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22097023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/getwiigywithit/pseuds/getwiigywithit
Summary: An AU of sorts where we see Jillian and Erin meet at different points in their lives before they actually work together.Or, Holtzmann asks Erin to marry her five times and then once more for real.(I’m not good at summaries, bye.)
Relationships: Erin Gilbert & Jillian Holtzmann, Erin Gilbert/Jillian Holtzmann
Comments: 34
Kudos: 117





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> Hiya,
> 
> I’m back! I didn’t expect my other fic to get the reception it did but I’m so happy to see that people enjoyed it. Anyway, I jokingly said on my twitter that maybe 2020 is the year I get my unfinished Holtzbert fics from my notes app finished and published and so... here I am with one of those unfinished fics.
> 
> Also, I’ve gotten into writing from their perspectives which I find a little easier. My last fic was from Holtz’s perspective. This one starts out from Erin’s and it may alternate chapter to chapter. I really don’t know yet so we’re all gonna be on this journey together.
> 
> Enjoy! ... maybe?

“Can I play with you guys?” 

You’re eight years old and you’re at the park. Your therapist suggested to your parents that it’d be a good idea to surround you with other kids. ‘ _Normal_ ’ kids that don’t see ghosts. Kids that don’t make fun of you for it like the ones at school do. 

While these kids don’t make fun of you, they’re not exactly interested in socializing with you either. 

“No.” One of them responds to your question. Judging by the way the others cross their arms and stare at you intimidatingly, you assume the one that spoke up is their ringleader. 

“Why not?” You dare to ask. At this point, you don’t really care to play with them but your mom watches from a bench in the distance and if she doesn’t see that you’ve made an effort, it’ll only give her something else to be disappointed in you for. 

“Because we’re playing Pretend Wedding and there’s no boys left to marry you.” The ringleader responds. 

“Even if there was, who would want to marry her?” One of the others speaks up and causes the rest of the group to break into laughter. 

You walk away before any of the tears that sting at your eyes could fall. You don’t cry. You won’t cry because if you do, it would give them something else to laugh at and you’re tired of being a joke to everyone. 

You find yourself sitting in the small tunnel of an empty jungle gym. Your mom is lost in conversation with other parents at the park. You hope she isn’t talking about you but she’s probably talking about you. You can tell by the look of disappointment on her face when she sees you walk off on your own. She doesn’t come to check on you. In her eyes, this is just another one of your ‘attention seeking’ episodes. 

You sit there in the tunnel and fiddle with your pigtails, willing time to move faster so that you can go home and be alone in your own world. It’s easier than being alone in a world where you don’t feel like you belong. Except, you’re not alone for much longer. 

“Hiya!” A small blonde girl’s face appears at the other end of the tunnel. Her cheek appears to have dirt on it and her hair is as wild as her eyes and semi-toothless grin.

You stare at her for a moment, unsure if she’s actually talking to you. She must be though since you’re the only other person in this tunnel. 

“Hi...” You say hesitantly like this is some sort of trick because you’ve fallen for this before when the kids at school thought it would be funny to make you feel included for once before they interrogated you with questions about your ‘ _ghost friend_ ’ and taunted you when said ‘ _ghost friend_ ‘ couldn’t come help you escape their relentless teasing. 

”Um... what do you want?” You ask the blonde girl. It’s not exactly polite but you’re not about to fall into a trap if that’s what this is. 

“I was just wondering why you’re sitting in this tunnel all by yourself.” The small blonde says and moves to sit on the inside of the tunnel with you. 

You shrug and say nothing for a moment. You’re a little annoyed that you have company now but you won’t push her away the way people push you away. ”How come you’re not playing with the other kids?”

“I tried to but they were all being a bunch of buttheads.” She answers and you look at her and while you’re still a little weary, you realize that maybe she doesn’t mean any harm after all. 

“You shouldn’t say that word...” You say quietly. 

“What? Buttheads? That’s what they are though. One of them pushed me in dirt. If I didn’t promise my dad that I’d stop punching boys in the face for being dumb, I would have socked the kid square in this eye.” She responds in a huff. You’re weariness is replaced with slight amusement. This girl is odd but she most definitely seems harmless. Toward you, at least. 

“How come _you_ aren’t playing with them?” She asks as she dusts off the dirt on her knees. 

“They’re playing some dumb pretend wedding game and they said I couldn’t play because there was no boys left to marry me.” 

“I’ll marry you!” She says quickly and now you look at her like she’s insane. She must be. 

“What? No, girls can’t marry girls...” You say because that’s what you’ve heard from family members and neighbors and other people in this small-minded small town. 

“They can if they love each other!” The girl responds and it makes sense to you. Just not in this moment. 

“But we don’t love each other. We don’t even know each other.” You say. You’ve been speaking for maybe five minutes now and still don’t even know this girl’s name. 

“Well you’re wearing a shirt with space on it and I love space so I love you.”

“You love me because you love my shirt?” You ask. This girl definitely has to be insane. 

“Yes. Now you try. Pick something about me that you love and then we can have our own pretend wedding.” She encourages you and you hesitate because while she’s odd, she’s also being nicer to you than anyone has in a while. Maybe ever. 

You look at her and try to pick something about her that stands out to you, finally settling on one thing. 

“You have light blue eyes... light blue is my favorite color...” You say quietly. 

“Perfect!” She grins. “Now we love each other and can pretend marry each other so... um what’s your name?” 

“Erin.” 

“So Erin... will you pretend marry me?” She asks with that same wild grin she had when she first approached you and you can’t help but giggle softly. 

“Yes!” You respond and smile at her for the first time. 

She cheers and takes your hand to lead you out of the tunnel so you can start planning your pretend wedding and pretend married life together when suddenly your mother comes over. 

“Erin, honey. Let’s go!” She says, holding out your jacket for you to put on. 

You don’t want to go. You’ve finally made a friend. Isn’t that exactly what she wanted when she brought you here?

“Can’t we stay a bit longer?” You ask, looking between your mom and your new friend.

“No, Erin. I have to start dinner soon now let’s go.” Your mother says and you know better than to argue with her. “Say goodbye to your... friend.” 

“Bye.” You say a bit sadly. The small girl squeezes your hand that she’s still holding and smiles at you. 

“Don’t worry. I come here everyday. Maybe if you come back another time, we can play again.” 

That gives you hope and you smile at her before waving your goodbye. You realize in the car on the way home that you never got her name. It doesn’t matter anyway... 

Your mom never brings you back to that park. 


	2. Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prepubescent Holtzmann meets Prepubescent Erin and they pair up for an unusual assignment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi,
> 
> Look at me still doing this writing thing. Wow! I'm honestly amazed that I haven't given up since writing is SO HARD. Here's a silly chapter that kicked my ass. I really struggled with this one but with some research, I found inspiration and now this is almost 2500 words.
> 
> Anyway, many thanks for your sweet comments on Chapter One. I hope you enjoy this one and that it measures up. See the end notes when you're finished reading for where my research came from.

You’re twelve years old and you’ve just realized that you like girls. That you _only_ like girls. You had an inkling that you did based on how much boys have always grossed you out. There’s also the amount of time you spend fawning over your middle aged neighbor, a forty something year old housewife that lets you swim in her pool on really hot days. However, it wasn’t until middle school that you were able to confirm your sexuality. 

It all started when your dad decided to re-enroll you in public school. You had been homeschooled for years after your first grade teacher had told him that you were far too advanced for elementary education. He took you out of school and got you a homeschool curriculum which he taught you himself. 

Homeschooling had its perks. You could take tests in your pajamas, work without limits and occasionally, your dad would take you on field trips which you realize now were just you running errands with him. Still, you enjoyed it. Not to mention, you were always at the top of your class. 

Though you were thriving academically, your dad worried about your social skills. You’re not exactly shy. You aren’t afraid to walk up to someone you think looks interesting and start a conversation. You probably do far too much and so your dad made sure to add _Stranger Danger_ to your homeschooling curriculum. Really the issue is that you really never had other people your age to converse with, and as amazing as it is that you can have a full conversation with your dad about chemical properties, you’re still twelve years old and should socialize with other twelve year olds and he’s been looking for another job and can no longer teach you himself. So, he enrolls you back into public school in the spring.

Middle school, you learn, is pretty terrible. On your first day you walk in and you’re immediately hit with the smell of old bologna and sweaty armpits. You see a group sixth grade boys launching spitballs at each other while a group of girls who are dressed like they’re in their twenties apply what’s probably their fourth layer of lipstick that morning across the hall. You duck yourself through the middle of the spitball fire and head to the main office for your schedule. 

Your first class of the day is an elective course. Unfortunately for you, starting school in the middle of the year means you don’t exactly get to elect yourself to take this class, it’s where they stick you... Home Economics. God, you’re already dreading it. 

You get to class a few minutes late, having gotten lost trying to find it. When you asked a kid for directions in the hallway, he laughed and said it was in the basement where all the reject electives are. He wasn’t wrong. 

You walk in and there’s maybe eleven other kids in the room. You suspect this might be what perfect attendance for this class looks like. That or anyone else that signed up is never coming back. 

The teacher gets excited when you walk in. She’s a strange, hippie looking type with comically large glasses. You can’t really judge the way she dresses though since you tried to convince your dad to let you wear a top hat to school. He said maybe not for your first day but Top Hat Tuesday could be a trend. You agreed.

You thought your teacher’s excitement was probably because she hadn’t expected to get another student in her class. What you learn though is that you were the missing piece she needed for the midterm project she had planned... The Marriage Project. 

You almost laugh because you’ve seen this on tv in multiple sitcoms you watch with your dad but you never thought schools _actually_ did this. 

She ushers you into the empty seat at the front of the class without introducing you as she goes on to explain the assignment. 

Two weeks simulating married life with a partner, a budget and different circumstances drawn from wild cards in each class that affect your spending needs. If you and your partner manage to not go bankrupt, you pass the project. If you can finish the project with a remaining budget of five hundred dollars or more, you get an A+ for your final grade. The teacher warns that she hasn’t had a single pair in all the years she’s assigned this project finish with more than a hundred dollars in their budget. A challenge... you like challenges. 

She allows the class to choose partners and within seconds, you look around and everyone is already paired off. Everyone except for you and one other girl who doesn’t move from her seat, instead jotting down notes for the assignment as the teacher writes them on the board. There’s a familiarity about her that you can’t quite place just yet. She sits by herself, away from the rest of the class. You wonder if it’s by choice or not. Regardless of whatever reason she’s isolated, you approach her anyway and not just because she’s the only unacquainted person left but because you feel drawn to her. A connection. You also find her really cute.

“Hiya! Looks like we’re partners.” You say and give her a friendly smile. 

She looks up from her notes cautiously and when her eyes land on yours, they linger for a moment. Almost like she recognizes something in them too. 

“Hi...” She says quietly. 

“Is this seat taken?” You ask, gesturing to the chair next to hers.

“Yes... I mean, no. You can take it.” She tells you and moves her backpack from it to the floor beside her. 

“Cool!” You smile gratefully and sit down. “Looks like we’re already acting like a married couple with the whole ‘what’s yours is mine and what’s mine is yours thing’, huh?” You joke because that’s what you do to deflect awkward situations and while she doesn’t laugh, you do manage to get a small smile out her. 

The teacher goes on to explain the first part of the assignment. You and your partner have to draw a card which determines your careers, the amount of money in your individual ‘bank accounts’ and your bi-weekly pay. Because the assignment is only two weeks long, you each will get paid twice a week. She also explains her role as the banker. Any time you and your partner need or owe money, have to pay a bill or purchase something, she will keep track of your budget to keep ensure there’s no cheating of any sort.

She calls up a pair at a time and while you wait for your turn, you decide to get to know your partner a little bit.

“I’m Holtzmann.” You hold your hand out for her to shake.

“I’m Erin.” Now that rings a bell. “With an E.” She responds and shakes your hand. Her hand is soft.

“Nice to meet you.” You smile at her again and let go of her hand. “So Erin with an E, how much would you say this class sucks? Like on a scale of 1-10, 1 being enjoyable and 10 being absolutely dreadful?”

“I’d give it a solid 9.” 

“Oh wow! I was expecting a 7 max. May I ask why you chose this elective out of the more promising sounding ones?”

“I didn’t.” She says a bit reluctantly. “I originally signed up for dance but the other girls in the class kept making fun of me so I asked to switch and this was the only other option.”

“Fuck them!” You say, only loud enough for her to hear because you don’t need your dad getting a phone call about you on the first day. At first she looks a bit taken aback by your word choice but then she laughs the slightest bit.

“Yeah…” She says quietly but smiling softly, feeling a bit bold now. “Fuck them!”

You grin widely, happy to see her smiling and opening up to you. 

“Well Erin with an E, while this class might suck and this assignment seems a little problematic to me, I think we’re gonna crush it.”

Her smile widens and she nods. “Yeah we are!”

The teacher calls the two of you up to draw your cards. There’s giggles and light chatter from the class which you expected considering you both are the only same sex ‘couple’. You let Erin draw first and she pulls the Neurosurgeon card with a generous pay. You pick next and pull the Firefighter card with a pay that’s less than half of your soon to be spouse’s. It doesn’t bother you though because you’re about to have a super cute, smart and rich wife. Yeah, you’re definitely going to crush this.

* * *

The next part of the assignment is the proposal/wedding planning. Before you and your partner can be married, you need to get engaged. The teacher shows off a collection of plastic rings, some prettier than others and each priced as they would be if they were real. While its assumed within the other couples that the boys will be buying the rings, neither you nor Erin are boys and so you must decide between each other who will purchase the engagement ring. Logically, Erin volunteers to because with her Neurosurgeon pay, she can afford more than you can. However, you are having none of that. You insist on buying the ring and Erin knows she won’t win this argument.

Now you know how the boys are going to play this game. You watch them survey the cheapest rings so that they can spend the least amount of money possible. You wonder if this is how they’ll go about it when it’s the real deal. You have a different strategy though. You walk over to the most expensive ring in the display. For a plastic ring, it’s actually very pretty, beautiful even. It could almost pass for the real thing. You don’t hesitate. 

“I’ll take this one!” You say and the class gasps around you because you’re about to blow seventy five percent of your budget. 

The teacher looks up at you to confirm. “Are you sure?” She asks, giving you a chance to change your mind before you can blow this assignment before it even starts.

“Positive.” You say confidently and she chuckles to herself, probably already assuming that you’ll go bankrupt but you are unfazed. She places the ring in a small velvet box and hands it off to you. You ignore the whispered comments from other students about the ‘idiot move’ you just made as you skip over to Erin who is mortified upon seeing how much you spent. 

“Why would you spend that much on an engagement ring?” She asks you with wide eyes.

“I have a plan. Do you trust me?” You ask her.

“I don’t even know you so how can I trust you?” She asks in exasperation.

“Well we’re about to be married so…”

“Fine! I’ll trust you but this better be a good plan!”

“It will be. Now…” You get down on one knee because even though the teacher made no mention of their needing to be an actual proposal, you still want this to be legit. You’re a gentle-lady after all. “Erin with an E, will you marry me?” You open the velvet box and present the plastic ring to her and even though its fake, there’s a hint of a blush on her cheeks.

“Yes…” She answers quietly and you beam with excitement before slipping the ring on her finger.

“I still can’t believe you blew most of your budget already.” She says as she looks at the ring and shakes her head.

“Only the best for my future wife.” You respond with a grin.

* * *

The two weeks of the assignment go by quickly. After your engagement, you plan the wedding. Erin starts to understand your plan more and more with each passing day. While the other couples plan more extravagant wedding ceremonies, you and Erin take the simpler approach. A courthouse union that costs you both almost nothing compared to what the other couples spend. You keep it simple because you learn that that’s what you both like anyway. While the other couples splurge on tropical week long honeymoons, you both choose a quaint weekend getaway to a lakeside bed & breakfast.

Married life Erin, you learn, is pretty great. You learn a lot about her and the things you have in common such as your mutual love for science. You get along well and you think this might be the first time that Erin’s ever opened up to someone like this because she speaks as though she expects judgement from you but you only tell her how cool she is and she lights up.

While your partnership is great, there are some hurdles in your married life along the way. You have an unexpected child, which you and Erin laugh about considering how ridiculous it is. You write “World’s Greatest Dad” on your forearm and wear it proudly throughout the remaining two weeks. At one point you lose your job as a firefighter and for a while Erin is the only provider which causes your budget to take a hard hit considering you’ve just simultaneously had to buy a house, pay your utility fees, pay taxes, pay your hospital bill _and_ send your kid off to college. But you still have hope that you’ll finish strong and now Erin does too. Your gut tells you to invest in a tech company named Apple because Erin tells you that apples are her favorite fruit. You take a chance and to your luck, all the money you spent starts to pour right back in.

By the end of the two weeks, despite how your naysaying classmates and teacher might have thought you were going to do on this assignment, you and Erin finish with a budget of half a million dollars, the highest in the class and in the assignment’s history. Your teacher is rendered speechless and your classmates scoff in jealousy as the second highest budget was only a little over two hundred dollars.

You and Erin pass the class with an A+ and you can’t help but feel a little disappointed that the project is over, having enjoyed married life with her so much.

“Great job, partner.” You say, smiling a bit sadly as you hold your hand up for a high five 

“Couldn’t have done it without you.” She responds and smiles back at you, high-fiving you.

At least, you think, that you still have the rest of the school year to become good friends with Erin. 

But then your dad gets a job in D.C and you move away before you can even get your ‘wife’s’ number to stay in touch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a link to the surge of inspiration I got: https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110904205227AA80AWz (See Favorite Answer)
> 
> Also, I definitely amped this shit up a bit with my love for the Game of Life and Bitlife. I warned you that this was silly!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter: @getwiigywithit


	3. Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii! Remember when I said that the last chapter kicked my ass? Well LOL because this one finished the job. I'm sorry it took me a while to update but I promise that I will not leave you hanging. This story will be complete, even if it kills me. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy this one! :)

You’re twenty-one and you’ve just made, what you’ll learn later on, is the biggest regret of your life... 

You ran away. 

You ran away from your life in Michigan. You ran away from your clueless parents and therapist. And you ran away from anyone that’s ever known you as _Ghost Girl_ . Including your best friend... your _only_ friend. 

Abby was the only person that believed you saw a ghost when you were eight years old, which is pretty messed up considering she didn’t come into your life until you were sixteen. She stood by your side during the relentless teasing and bullying from your peers, even endured some of it herself, and never once did she make you feel bad for it…

But now you’ve gone and thrown that away. 

This wasn’t supposed to happen. You were finally coming to terms with being Ghost Girl… as long as more people didn’t find out about it. Back in Battle Creek, everyone knew about _crazy_ , _attention seeking_ Erin Gilbert who saw a ghost when she was eight years old but in Ann Arbour, you were just Erin Gilbert. If anyone there knew about the ghost thing, they made no mention of it. You could finally live a normal life. 

Well, as normal as it could get when you’re still theorizing and studying the paranormal with your best friend. But no one else knows about that and no one else _needs_ to know about that. 

It’s stupid really. Of course people would find out eventually with you co-writing a whole book on the subject and all. You thought that maybe you would be okay with that. That maybe with all of your extensive research and scientific backing, people might actually take it seriously. Take _you_ seriously. You were excited about the book in its conception but the more it started to come together, the more real it became that soon _everyone_ would know and if they’re anything like the people in Battle Creek, you would never have a normal life. So you ran.

You would be lying if you said running away was a sudden decision. You had been working yourself up for it the moment Abby had booked the two of you to appear on the campus cable show to speak about the book. You had months to prepare for it, months to mentally prepare yourself for whatever criticisms there might be. Deep down you knew you couldn’t do it but you wanted to prove yourself wrong. You couldn’t though. Instead you made an escape plan. 

MIT held the promise of the opportunity to get away from it all. _Away_ away. It would be a fresh start. A new school in a different state with different people. No one who would know about the _infamous_ Ghost Girl. You applied and immediately regretted it since you did it behind your best friend’s back. You couldn’t bring yourself to tell her that you’d been accepted. You didn’t think you had to because you really did try to stay. You _wanted_ to be there with Abby. You _wanted_ to talk about your book that you worked so hard on, and were so proud of. You _wanted_ to show everyone that’s ever doubted you a hard copy of what you know to be true because you experienced it firsthand but you just couldn’t do it. 

Leaving wasn’t an easy decision but it was necessary for you to go if you wanted any sense of normalcy in your life. You accepted your MIT admission and in the weeks leading up to the interview, you slowly packed up your life in Ann Arbour and on the day of the interview, you left without a trace. No letter, no phone call, no goodbye, and not because you didn’t want to say goodbye to Abby but because you know that saying goodbye would have made this so much more difficult. You honestly could care less about leaving your home state or your family. But leaving Abby behind feels like walking away from the better part of yourself. The part of yourself that’s free and doesn’t care what anyone has to say because that’s who Abby is.

But that’s not who you are. 

So you leave. You tell yourself that Abby would be better off without you. She’s smart and she’s fearless, she’ll be fine. You, on the other hand, aren’t fine. 

While MIT is everything you’ve ever wanted academically, it’s lonely and that makes you miserable. You don’t know anyone since you’ve transferred during the Spring semester. Even though you aren’t the only one, it still feels like everyone else has found their circle and you’re on the outside and it’s hard because you could really use a friend right now. Someone you can vent to about everything without judgement. Abby would have been that friend if she wasn’t the one you were running away from. So, you do what anyone your age would do if they needed to blow off some steam…

You end up at a bar.

You don’t enjoy drinking. Once you and Abby had become old enough to legally drink, you celebrated with a six-pack of beer. It was terrible and after four and a half of them, you ended up clutching the toilet bowl the whole night. Since then, you’ve learned to drink in moderation but still you find yourself cringing at the sting of alcohol as it goes down your throat. But now, you crave that sting. You crave anything that’ll make you forget about your monumental mistake. 

The older woman behind the bar gets one look at you when you walk in and tells you that she’ll fix you something strong. You give her a small but grateful smile and take a seat at the bar, fiddling with the napkin square in front of you as you wait. One… two… drinks later and you’re starting to loosen up a bit but still not enough. 

You’re about to order another drink when a gentleman comes over and takes a seat on the stool next to yours. He looks a lot older than you are. Not drastically but he’s got at least ten years on you and his smile is laced with confidence or cockiness as he gives you a once over before he speaks.

“Hi there. Can I buy you a drink?” He asks you, leaning a little into your space.

“No thank you.” You say and hope he goes away. Yes, you want another drink but you do not want to engage with this man any further. You’re pretty sure that’s a wedding ring on his finger and you are not about to be his co-ed mistress.

“You sure? You look like you could use another.” He says, gesturing toward your empty glass and slowly leaning more into your space.

“I said no thank you.” You say a bit shakily. You’re not used to being hit on and you’ve certainly never been hit on in a bar by some older, sleazy guy.

“Oh come on, I’m just trying to be a gentleman. A beautiful young lady is sitting all by herself in a bar late at night. You look like you could use some company.” He says and he’s even closer than before. You can smell the alcohol on his breath and your anxiety is starting to rise.

“I’m not interested. Please leave me alone.” You say bluntly, hoping and praying he goes away. You look for the bartender to see if maybe she could save you but she’s at the other end of the bar, talking to a few patrons.

“Baby, there’s nothing to be afraid of. I don’t bite… unless you want me to.” He says with a dirty grin, moving closer and you’re about to flee when suddenly an arm around your shoulders and voice freezes you in place.

“ _Babe_ , is this guy bothering you?”

You look up at whoever it is and see a blonde girl who appears to be around your age. She’s got an intricate looking curly updo and she’s wearing glasses with yellow lens. Something about her feels familiar and that’s what makes you go along with what she’s saying, instead of going off on her for thinking that it’s okay to just put her arm around a stranger.

“Y-yeah.” You respond a bit shakily and try to compose yourself. “I told him to leave me alone but he wouldn’t go away.”

“Is that right?” The blonde responds as she stares at the man with daggers in her eyes. “Hey buddy, I do believe that my _girlfriend_ here said that she isn’t interested.” 

“Your _girlfriend_?” He scoffs. “Yeah right! If she’s your girlfriend then why was she drinking all by herself?”

“Because I had to grab some lighter fluid for my blowtorch on my way here. It’s in my car, would you like to see it?” The blonde responds right away. You’re pretty positive that she’s not making that up.

The _“_ gentleman _”_ tries to not let his resolve fall as he gives up. “Whatever.” He grumbles as he walks away.

“Yeah, thought so.” The blonde says in his direction, waiting until he’s left the bar before removing her arm from around your shoulders. 

“Thank you--” “I’m sorry about that--”

You both speak at the same time. 

“Wait, why are you sorry?” You ask her.

“For putting my arm around you without your permission.” She says sheepishly and shrugs. “You just looked like you could use a save.”

“Well I did so thank you.” You smile at her to show that you’re grateful for her help. You honestly don’t know what would have happened if she didn’t show up when she did. “Can I buy you a drink for saving my ass? Please?” You offer.

“Sure.” She smiles and sits on the stool next to yours, facing you a bit.

“I’m Erin.” You say, holding out your hand.

“With an E, right?” She asks and smirks.

You pause and get a proper look at her. The recognition hits you immediately.

“Holtzmann?” You ask with wide eyes.

“That’s me.” She smiles at you and of course it’s her. Aside from the glasses and the hair, everything about her is the same, just with some years for her to grow into her features. 

“I-I can’t believe this. It’s been what? Nine years?” 

“Yep, nearly a decade.” 

“Wow. How have you been? What happened to you? You sort of just disappeared?”

“Yeah, my dad got a job in DC so we had to pack up and leave pretty abruptly.” Holtzmann responds. “Took some adjusting but I’ve been alright and now I’m here in Cambridge.”

“Wait, you don’t go to MIT, do you?”

“I do. I’m in the Engineering department.” 

“No way! I just transferred here. I’m in the Physics department.” 

“No way!” Holtzmann with an excited grin. “What a small world!” 

The bartender comes over and the two of you order a drink and mozzerella sticks per Holtzmann’s request.

“So how have _you_ been, Erin with an E?” Holtzmann asks, taking a sip from her drink.

“I’m good. I’ve been good.” You say and you don’t even believe yourself when the words come out of your mouth so you’re positive that Holtzmann doesn’t believe you either.

She looks at you without saying anything and suddenly you’re gulping down your entire drink and you tell her _everything_. You tell her about Abby, you tell her about the ghost, you tell her about your family and your therapist and your bullies and she listens. She listens to you ramble on and on about your life up until this point and doesn’t say a word until you’re done and out breath from speaking so much, so fast.

“Next drink is on me.” Holtzmann says and gets the bartender’s attention as you sit there and try to relax but you can’t breathe and you’re starting to panic a bit. Holtzmann turns back to you and notices right away.

“Hey Erin, its okay. Just breathe. You’re okay. Its okay.” She says to calm you but you just shake your head.

“It’s not okay! I abandoned my best friend. I’m a shitty person!” You start to cry.

“No, Erin. You’re not a shitty person. You’re not. You’ve just had a shitty life and you wanted to get away from that. That doesn’t make you shitty.” Holtzmann says, reaching out her hands to your shoulders to help calm you.

“Then why do I feel so shitty?” You ask her, focusing on her hands that ground you in place.

“It’s not an easy thing to walk away from people you care about.” Holtzmann says. “Especially someone you’ve connected with. But you did what you had to do for yourself and that doesn’t make you a bad person. I don’t think you’re a bad person for it.”

“You don’t?” You ask, sniffling as you finally start to calm down.

“I don’t. You had a hard life. I can relate to that. But things won’t always be this terrible. I’m a firm believer that things get better with time. Take my ears, for example. I thought I was gonna have to find a way to shrink these babies.” 

You snort as you laugh and Holtzmann smiles at you. She removes her hands from your shoulders to hand you a napkin for your remaining tears and you immediately miss the contact.

“Thanks, Holtzmann.” You say softly, feeling a little less shitty than you did when you first came to the bar. 

She smiles at you again. “Now, let’s drink to our shitty lives and catch up on the good stuff. I wanna hear all about your big ideas and theories.”

“Only if you tell me yours too.” You say with a smile.

“Deal.”

* * *

The two of you spend hours catching up. Holtzmann talks excitedly about her inventions or her “babies” as she likes to call them and you tell her all about your theories and research. You’d expect anyone to get bored hearing you go on about particle physics and ghosts but Holtzmann gives you her undivided attention and she’s so interested and excited about everything that comes out of your mouth.

“Did you really spend the night in a haunted house to document ghost activity?” She asks with wide eyes.

“Yes…” You answer a bit sheepishly.

“Wow! Brains, beauty and badass. Marry me!” Holtzmann pretends to faint onto the bar.

You giggle and blush. “Didn’t I already?” You ask.

She chuckles. “Yeah, best two weeks of my life.” 

You blush some more and try to hide your face behind your glass as you down your next drink.

By the end of the night, you’re pretty drunk and you know it but you’re having a great time. You slowly start to lean more into the bar to keep yourself up and when you’re about to wave the bartender over for your next drink, Holtzmann stops you. 

“How about we get you home, Erin with E?”

“But I don’t wanna go home. I’m having a good time with you.” You whine in your drunken state.

“I’m having a good time with you too, Er. You won’t be having a good time in the morning though if you have another drink. Come on, I’ll pay off our tabs and get you home.”

“M’kay.” You say and rest your head on the bar.

* * *

You expect Holtzmann to just put you in a cab and leave you on your merry way but no, she doesn’t only make sure that you get back to campus safely, she also makes sure that you get back to your room. It’s a good thing you don’t have a roommate because they’d hate you for coming in at this hour as inebriated as you are. Holtzmann makes sure you get into bed and gets you some water and some aspirin, making you take them before she goes.

“You’ll thank yourself for taking these in the morning Trust me.” She says.

You swallow the pills with some water and kick your shoes off as you get under your covers, already half asleep.

Holtzmann is about to turn off the lights and see herself out when your voice stops her in her tracks.

“Holtzmann?” You call out to her.

“Yeah?” She turns around to face you.

You gesture for her to come closer and she does.

“Thank you.” You say softly and muster up as much energy as you can to lift your body enough to press a kiss to her cheek.

Now Holtzmann is the one blushing.

You notice and give her a sleepy smile before laying back down and falling right asleep. 

Holtzmann smiles to herself and shuts off the light.

“Sleep tight, Erin with an E.” She whispers before she goes, shutting the door behind her quietly.

You sleep peacefully that night and every night while you’re at MIT knowing that you aren’t alone. You miss Abby dearly but having Holtzmann around makes it a little easier. 

It’s one semester of things feeling okay and normal for once. Then Holtzmann gets accepted into CERN and the two of you part ways again. For some reason, this takes you a little longer to get over.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What an adventure! We're halfway there, folks! Halfway there!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter: @getwiigywithit


	4. Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Hi! I know, I know. It’s been a minute. My apologies for being late with this one. I had a very stressful past week with work but now things have slowed down a bit and so I finally was able to finish this one which funny enough, was the first chapter of this story that was mostly written. How bout that? Anyway, I know we’re used to going back and forth between Erin and Holtz’s perspective but I’m about to shake that up a bit since this one felt right coming from Erin’s. I hope you all like it. I saw your comments on the last chapter and decided to end things here a bit differently. Enjoy! ;)
> 
> Also, I didn’t proofread this so my apologies for errors. I will fix them eventually.

You’re thirty two and you’re up for tenure. You’ve been working so hard for this for years and now it’s finally your time. But of course, on the day of your first tenure review, you overslept.

Your alarm hadn’t gone off this morning which is unusual because you always make sure to set it before bed. You think there must have been a power outage overnight because when you open your eyes to check the time, suspicious of the amount of sleep you’re getting, 12:00am blinks on the alarm clock despite the fact that there’s sunshine pouring in through your window blinds. You sit up quickly, grabbing your phone to see the correct time. 7:32am. Thirty two minutes after you were supposed to get up. 

“Shit!” 

Now you’re running out of bed and have a half hour before you need to be out the door. You shower and dress in record time and manage to get your hair and makeup done quickly too. You look good but you feel cranky for rushing and knowing you’ll have to skip your morning coffee and breakfast in order for you to make it to work on time doesn’t help your sour mood.

The subway isn’t an option since you’re already cutting it close so you opt for a rideshare and anxiously tap your heel on the sidewalk while you wait. Your car pulls up to the front of your building and you quickly hop in the back, confirming you name and drop off location with the driver and letting him know it’s really important you get there quickly. 

_ “You carry a lot of tension in your shoulders...” _

You jump in surprise, turning toward the voice coming from your left. Somehow in your rush to get into the car, you hadn’t noticed that there was another passenger in the car, nor did you see who the passenger is. 

“Holtzmann?” You look at her properly. Somehow you keep ending up in the same place at the same time.

“In the flesh.” Holtzmann grins. 

Your frustration and anxiety from oversleeping this morning have yet to subside and the rational part of your brain is still half asleep since you didn’t have your coffee. In other words, you’re really cranky. “How are you here? Are you following me?”

“Huh? No. That’s not even possible. We haven’t seen each other since MIT. Also, you’re the one that jumped into my car.” 

She’s got you there. 

“I— Nevermind.” You say in a huff, sitting back in your seat and buckling your seatbelt because you might be in a rush but you won’t let that stop you from being safe. 

“Hm. This reunion feels a lot different than the last.” Holtzmann says with a slight frown. 

You sigh because it’s not her fault you’re running late. “I’m sorry. I’m just in a bad mood because overslept this morning and now I’m going to be late for a lecture that I’m supposed to teach in twenty minutes and if I don’t make it in time, I’m absolutely positive that my boss will hold it over me in my tenure review and I just really need to get there on time so that I could get secure my job and then I won’t have to kiss his or anyone else’s ass anymore or at least, as much as I already have to just to prove that I am perfectly capable and competent enough to do my job.” 

Holtzmann blinks which is probably a normal reaction considering you rushed all of that out in one breath. She leans forward to speak to the driver. “Hey Jim, could we maybe drop off Erin here first? I’m in no rush.”

Jim grumbles at the fact he’ll have to switch his route but does so, making a turn at the next corner. 

You stare at her in confusion. “What? You didn’t have to do that. You were here first.”

Holtzmann waves you off. “Like I said, I’m in no rush. Plus, I’d rather help you out so that you don’t have to kiss any more asses.”

“That’s... really nice of you. Thank you!” You suddenly feel all of your crankiness slip away. You sit in silence for a bit before you start to speak again. “This is kind of bizarre.”

“What?”

“This. How we keep running into each other after all these years apart. I guess the world really is small.”

“Maybe.” Holtzmann starts. “Or it’s just fate.”

“You really believe that?” You chuckle as you ask.

“Just calling it like I see it. This is what? The fourth time we’ve met into each other now?” 

“What? No. That’s impossible. It’s only been three times.” 

“Really? There was the bar, the park, middle scho--”

“Wait, did you say the park?” You cut her off.

“Yes, the park. That’s where we first met.” Holtzmann says.

“You remember that?”

“Of course. How could I forget my first marriage?”

“I can’t believe you remember that.” You say while shaking your head. 

“I can’t believe  _ you _ remember that.” Holtzmann says with a grin. “You’ve never mentioned it.”

“Well I didn’t want to look crazy in you case you forgot.”

“You’re not easy to forget.” Holtzmann says with a sincerity that makes you feel light.

You clear your throat because it’s gone dry for some reason. “So the last time I saw you, you were heading off to CERN. How was that?”

“Uh perhaps that’s a story for another time.” Holtzmann says a bit anxiously. 

You frown a bit but don’t push her into saying anything more about it.

“How’s everything with you though? She asks you. 

“Good. Things are good.” You say and you know it sounds forced. “After MIT, I went to Princeton to get my doctorate and now I’m teaching at Columbia.”

“That awesome!” Holtzmann says, sounding impressed. “Your parents must be proud.”

“You’d think so…” You say and sigh. “It’s just never enough. First it was all ‘ _ Erin, make friends... Erin, stop believing in ghosts… Erin, go to an Ivy League...’ _ . Now it’s  _ ‘Erin, when are you gonna get married and give us a grandkid?’.”  _ You frown as you recount the hundreds of times you’ve had to hear that question. 

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Holtzmann shakes her head. “Let me know if you’re ever interested in freaking them out, I can help. I could pose as your lesbian wife you eloped with in Vegas and that our wedding officiated by an Elvis impersonator.”

“You’re ridiculous.” You giggle and shake your head.

“Maybe so but I made you laugh.” Holtzmann smiles. 

“I just might take you up on that offer during the holidays.” You joke. 

“Great. I’m happy to be of service for just three meals a day and lodging.” She jokes back at you. 

You both laugh into a comfortable silence. You feel the cab slow to a stop and look out the window, realizing you’re at your destination. All of your anxiety about being late for work has now turned into disappointment that you have to get out of this cab. 

“Well this is me...” You say but don’t move to get out just yet. 

“Did we get here on time?” Holtzmann asks. 

You look at your phone and you’re relieved to see you did. “Yeah. Looks like I might even have time to get coffee before my first lecture.”

“Woo!” Holtzmann raises her arms in pride. “Nice work, Jim.” She pats the driver’s shoulder and he grumbles something under his breath.

“Uh so speaking of coffee…” You start wringing your hands together nervously. “Maybe you’d like to—“

“Yes!” Holtzmann says before you could finish. 

You try to hide your excitement (and relief) and dig into your briefcase on your lap to take out a pen and card to scribble your number. 

“Um that’s my cell. Just text me when you’re free and we can set something up.” You say and hand her the card. Your fingers brush and you feel your cheeks heat up. 

Holtzmann grins at the card and then at you. “Will do. Probably right after you get out of the cab because you know… I don’t want to look uncool in front of my pal Jim here.”

You giggle softly and open the car door, climbing out and keeping the door open so you can speak. “Thanks again, Holtzmann.” You smile at her.

“It was nothin’.” Holtzmann says, waving her hand. “Have a great tenure review, Erin with E.” She salutes you off. 

“Bye.” You wave before walking off toward campus. 

The cab pulls away and Holtzmann immediately adds your number into her phone and texts you her availability for coffee. She makes no mention of the fact that having the driver switch your routes made her twenty minutes late for a job interview. 

She still lands the job.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you enjoy this chapter? Leave a comment or kudos.
> 
> Want to talk about this story with me, maybe beta read, and hold me accountable to finishing it? Follow me on Twitter: @getwiigywithit
> 
> Want to just talk to me about Holtzbert and Kristen Wiig and Kate McKinnon and be friends? Actually follow me on Twitter and let’s be BFFs. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! :)


	5. Five Pt.1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hello...
> 
> Okay, please hear me out. Life has been incredibly busy and overwhelming. I did not mean for this chapter to take me so long to post. Between work, hating my job, performances, rehearsals and writers block, this fic was on my mind but I couldn't write the chapter. Now that I have some free time, I am hoping to be able to finish it soon without making you all wait too long.
> 
> Now, here's another thing. If you haven't already noticed, this fic went from 6 to 7 chapters. Yeah... I know. that is because this chapter is in two parts due to the length of it. Part 2 WILL be up within the next two days (my hope is that it's up tomorrow). Even thought that means a little more waiting, I really hope you enjoy this first part because I enjoyed writing it. 
> 
> Leave your thoughts in the comments below! :-)

You’re nervous. You’re going out for coffee with Erin Gilbert and you’re not even sure that you have anything to be nervous about. It’s just coffee, right? It’s not like it’s a date. Erin didn’t say it was a date or anything... although, you really kind of hope it is.

You’d be lying to yourself and anyone who asks if you’d said that you haven't been crushing Erin Gilbert since… well since you’ve met her. That might sound silly considering you were really young then and while you’ve known Erin for many years, most of those years were spent apart and not knowing if you’d ever see her again, even though a part of you always knew that you would. 

So here you are, debating on what to wear for your coffee  **not-date** . A suit is too formal, right? But a crop-top feels too casual. What do people wear to coffee shops anyway? You rummage through your closet for a while before finally deciding on a shirt with overalls. It’s  _ just _ coffee, you remind yourself. 

Once you’ve gotten yourself ready, you head out. You technically didn’t need to leave your apartment for another half hour since the coffee shop only a few blocks away but you want to make sure that you’re punctual for Erin. You’re still nervous when you get there and you don’t know why. You’ve never been nervous on any other date— **not-date** you’ve gone on and you’ve been on plenty over the years. This one just feels…  _ different _ . Not a bad different but just  _ different _ . 

You wait outside of the coffee shop for a while because it’s nice out but then you think that might be weird to just loiter outside so you head inside in search of the  _ best _ table; not too close to the door so if Erin orders a hot coffee, it won’t get cold too fast; not too close to the windows with the sun gleaming in so if Erin orders an iced coffee, the ice won’t melt; not too near other tables since you want to be able to hear Erin loud and clear. The table must be perfect! After a good look around and some aggressive eye contact with an older gentleman taking his time to pack up his things and leave, you finally find the perfect spot and plant yourself there.

You sit for a little while, anxiously bouncing your leg while you wait. You pass time by watching the people around you, trying to imagine what their lives must be like. You get so lost in your people watching that you don’t even notice right away when Erin arrives... until she’s standing right in front of you.

“Hello, Holtzmann.” Erin says with a soft smile. 

Your eyes meet hers and all of your nerves slip away because of course they did. It’s Erin. You’ve never had to be nervous with Erin before. You return her smile and stand up to greet her  _ (because you’re a gentlewoman) _ . She hugs you and that takes you a bit by surprise but you’re complaining as you're enveloped by warmth and the smell of coconut. The two of you pull apart and that's when you take in Erin’s casual and more relaxed  _ (but still very well put together) _ look. She’s wearing a baseball tee, jeans and sneakers, completely different from the tweed she was almost head to toe in that last time you saw her. She still managed to make it work but you must admit, Comfortable Erin is something out of a dream.

“Holtz?” Erin’s voice brings you back from your thoughts.

“Huh?

“I was just asking what you’d like to drink so I can go order for us.” Erin says as she pulls her wallet out of her purse.

“Oh, I can order--” You start and move to stand up but Erin waves you off. 

“I’ve got it, Holtz. It’s on me!” Erin smiles sweetly and you get a funny feeling in your stomach. Not the same funny feeling you got after eating sushi from 7/11. This feeling is more like what you imagine people mean when they say they have butterflies in their tummy, except yours feels more like birds since it's much stronger than that. “So what can I get for you?”

“Would you judge me if I get a hot chocolate even though it's 64 degrees outside?” You ask seriously and wait for any hint of judgement.

“Hm, a hot chocolate actually sounds really good right about now.” Erin says with no lace of judgment whatsoever. “Whipped cream?”

“I’d be offended if you brought me a cup without any.” 

Erin giggles. “Coming right up.” She shoots you a finger gun before heading to the counter to order. You swear you feel something hit you in the chest when she does. Probably Cupid’s bow or some other cute shit.

You wait patiently and soon Erin returns, balancing her wallet and a tray with two hot chocolates and a plate of something delectable in her hands.

“Alright…” Erin sighs peacefully as she sets the tray down and takes a seat. “I hope you like cheesecake. It looked too good to pass up.”

“You bought a slice of cheesecake just for me?”

“Well I figured we could share… if that’s okay?” Erin asks sheepishly.

“More than.” You grin and get up to grab two forks, offering one to Erin when you return to the table.

“Thank you!” She smiles.

“Thank me? Thank  _ you _ ! You really didn’t have to treat me.”

“I wanted to.” Erin says genuinely. “It’s the least I could do after what you did for me in our last chance meeting.”

“That was nothing...”

“Well that nothing helped me make it to work on time. If I had been late, I don’t think I would have made it to the next step in my tenure review process.”

“You made it? Congrats!” You say with genuine excitement.

“Only to the next step but it’s still something. I get to lecture in the big hall in a few weeks and if that goes well, then it won’t be much longer until I get my tenure.” Erin explains and you feel so proud of her and all that she’s accomplished thus far. You make sure to tell her that since you know Erin enough to know that she doesn’t always give herself enough credit.

“That’s awesome, Er. I always knew you do big things with all of those big ideas you have.”

Erin blushes. “Thanks, Holtz. What about you? What are you up to these days?”

“Well I’ve been doing a lot of freelance projects here and there. I also just recently started a new job in a small lab doing independent projects with my teammate. Or well, partner since there’s only two of us.”

“What kinds of projects?” Erin asks interestedly.

“I can’t say too much about them since some of them are top secret. However, I can show you some photos of my babies I’m working on and explain what they do with no context on what they’re for.” You offer and pull your phone out of your pocket.

“Okay.” Erin chuckles softly and doesn’t press you for any details you can’t or aren’t ready to share. You appreciate this about her. It’s like when she asked you about CERN the last time you met and she didn’t push you then either. It’s a quality about her that only makes you want to tell her everything about you.

You’re about to just hand her your phone to let her scroll through the photos of your  _ babies _ when suddenly Erin’s moving her seat to your side of the table and sits close to you, peering over your shoulder. You’re blushing a little now since she’s close enough that your arms touch and you can smell that intoxicating coconut scent again. You clear your throat to compose yourself and smile at her before you start to give her a thorough explanation of each device in the photos. 

You’ve done this before with other dates and usually lose their attention after explaining the first project or two. Erin is different though. She listens actively, asks questions and marvels in your work the way no others have because she actually  _ understands _ it. It feels like she  _ understands _ you.

  
  


Erin’s wiping tears from her eyes as she laughs at a story you were in the middle of telling. The two of you have been sitting in the coffee shop for at least two hours. Your hot chocolates and cheesecake long gone.

“Oh my God, you set your apartment on fire how many times?” 

“Only three...” You say like it’s nothing. Erin doesn’t need to know how many fires you set in your lab after only working there for two weeks.

“ **_Three?_ ** Holtz, even once is one time too many. How have you not been evicted?” 

“I’m nice!” You say with a chuckle. It’s true. You may set off the fire alarm at least five times a week but your neighbors know they can count on you when they need something in their apartments repaired.

Erin laughs softly and sighs contentedly. “This was fun.”

“I wholeheartedly agree.” You say honestly. “It’s always nice getting to see you and catch up.”

“Likewise.” Erin says softly. “Thanks for agreeing to come out with me. I haven’t been on a date this nice since… Well I’ve never been on a date this nice.”

“This was a date?” You ask with wide eyes and your heart thumping in your chest excitedly.

“Oh um I thought-- I guess I-- I’m sorry--” Erin stutters and tenses up.

“No, no, no. Don’t apologize! I’m really relieved right now!”

“Really? You’re not just saying that?” 

“I almost wore a suit here because I didn’t know if it was a date or not and I really hoped it was.” You say honestly.

“Oh…” Erin blushes and visibly relaxes. 

You smile at her, nudging her shoulder with yours.

“Well since we both had a good time… maybe you’d like to have dinner with me sometime? And by that I mean that maybe you’d like to go on another date?” You ask a bit nervously. Just in case this was a one and done thing because you’ve been fooled by others in the past.

“I would love to.” Erin smiles.

“Awesome.” You can’t help but grin in return, dimples and all. “Are you free this Friday night?”

“Not anymore. It’s a date.” Erin confirms.

“It’s a date.”

Erin looks at the time on her phone and sighs. “I hate to leave but I should get going. I have to grade some papers before my students start emailing me to ask about their grades.”

“Sounds fun!” You say sarcastically and chuckle.

Erin bumps you with her shoulder this time. “Hey, we can’t all live exciting lives where we set our apartments on fire every five minutes.” She jokes as she gets up.

“For the record, those fires were seven minutes apart.” You follow her and the two of you giggle as you leave the coffee shop. You both linger outside in a comfortable silence for a moment. “Thanks again for the hot chocolate and cheesecake.”

“It was nothing…” She says, echoing you from earlier. “I’ll see you Friday? Just text me where I should meet you.”

“I can pick you up from your place… if you’re comfortable with that.”

“Yeah, I’ll text you my address.” Erin smiles.

“Cool. Well, I’ll see you then.” You say, feeling shy all of a sudden.

“See you then.” Erin says and pauses for a moment before leaning forward and pressing a soft kiss to your cheek. “Bye, Holtz.” She takes off in the opposite direction and leaves you awestruck right in front of the coffee shop. Your cheek tingles and that feeling in your tummy intensifies. You just had a date with Erin and you’re going on another date with her this Friday.

“Woo!” You say loudly and pump your fist in the air, not caring that people around you are staring. You walk all the way home like that. Only three more days until Friday.

… You can’t wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Funny story about Holtz’s “I’m nice” line. I took it from an improv show I saw Katie Dippold (Ghostbusters 2016 co-writer) in back one 2017. It was a camp scene and they had a backpack as the prop and Katie had to dig through several things within that backpack to find a secret message which was “I’m nice” and it was hidden in a tiny Vaseline jar. I will never forget it. I met her late that night at an after party and told her I loved Ghostbusters 2016. I can confirm that she is in fact nice.


	6. Five Pt.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Erin and Holtzmann go on a date-date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heh... remember when I said I'd post this within 2 days of my last chapter? I'm sorry, lol. Thank you @ForxGood for being my accountability-buddy and calling me out. I hope this chapter makes up for the long wait.

You’re nervous. You’ve already changed your outfit _three_ times, you can’t decide whether you should wear your hair up or down and your hand shakes as you apply mascara. You’re going on a date with Holtzmann. **A date-date** . Not a chance meeting at a bar or a casual coffee date but an _actual_ date. Holtzmann texted you the name of the restaurant you’ll be going to and it’s a quaint Italian restaurant on the Upper East Side. It’s fancy and admittedly you were surprised that she even suggested it since Holtzmann doesn’t strike you as someone who eats at gourmet restaurants with what you’ve learned about her eating habits but she insists on taking you there and _“blowing your mind with the best pasta you can get in New York City”_.

After changing your outfit for the _fourth_ time, there’s a knock on the door and you look at the clock to see that it’s already seven on the dot. The time Hotlzmann said she’d pick you up from your apartment. You have no time to change again so you stick to what you’re currently wearing and give yourself a quick check in the mirror before you go to the door. You take a quick grounding breath before you open it, trying to calm your nerves so Holtzmann won’t notice. You want tonight to go as well as the other day, maybe even better than the other day. Ever since Holtzmann brought up the thing about fate back when you ended up in the same cab, you’ve been thinking a lot lately about the odds of you both repeatedly crossing paths and how maybe it isn’t just a coincidence but perhaps the universe trying to bring the two of you together. In any case, you want to see where this goes because unlike your previous ventures into the dating world, you feel something unique with Holtzmann. Something real and easy and worth pursuing now so you don’t have to wait another ten years for another chance.

Despite all of your nerves leading up to this date, the second you open the door and your eyes meet Holtzmann’s you feel a sense of relief wash over you. 

“Hi…” You say softly.

The look on her face and the whispered _“woah”_ as she takes in the sight of you makes you smile and blush because unlike your previous suitors, there isn’t an ounce of scrutiny in Holtzmann’s voice. Just pure and genuine awe that makes you giddy with excitement and possibility. 

“Hey. Hi. You look… wow.” Holtzmann says, still trying to gather the right words.

“Like good wow or--” You start but before you can even finish, she’s nodding almost frantically.

“Yes!” She says and takes a deep breath. “You look incredible!” 

“Thank you! You do too!” You say honestly because she does. She _really_ does. She’s wearing a while button down shirt with black slacks and a matching jacket and shoes. It’s a look that you would have never pictured her in with her usual attire being so casual and eccentric but there’s still elements of her personality in there from the rose colored glasses, the signature hairdo you’ve come to know and her tie with the periodic table of elements printed on it.

“Thanks!” She smiles shyly and pushes the bouquet of flowers she’s holding toward you. “These are for you. I hope you like daisies.” She says nervously.

“They’re my favorite. Thank you!” You smile and take them from her. “I’ll just put these in a vase and then we can head out. Please come in and have a seat.” You lead her inside and let her look around while you grab a vase and fill it with water before neatly arranging the flowers.

“You have a really nice place!” Holtzmann says from where she’s standing in the living room.

“Oh thank you!” You say as you set the vase of the daisies at the center of your dining table where they will get the best amount of natural light and be seen from the entrance of your apartment. You grab your purse from where it hangs on one of the chairs and catch another glass at yourself in the mirror near the door before you turn to Holtzmann. “Ready to go?”

“Readier than ever!” She grins and holds out her arm for you to grab onto which you do without hesitation. 

“Let’s go!”

* * *

The restaurant is lovely but Holtzmann is lovelier. She holds the door open for you when you arrive and pulls your chair out for you before the waiter can once you get to the table. She doesn’t try to order for you or rush you to decide on what you want. The two of you fall into easy conversation after you order. Just like all of the conversations you have together, there’s no pressure to be anything but yourself, your nerves from earlier forgotten. As you speak, Holtzmann listens to every word you say and she responds with excitement to almost everything you talk about. She is sweet and funny and everything your last romantic prospect wasn’t. The date is going perfectly…

That is, until your ex walks in.

Holtzmann is in the middle of a story, just about to tell you what she saw on the subway earlier today when you cut her off.

“Shit!” You say just loud enough for the two of you to hear.

“Surprisingly no but I’ve definitely seen that a few times too many…” Holtzmann says.

“No, I mean--” You duck your head. “You see that guy that just walked in with that woman?” You ask Holtzmann. She lifts her head to look in that direction. “No, don’t look!” You tell her. 

“Who is he?” She asks.

“He’s my ex and sadly also a colleague of mine.” You say. “We dated a year ago on and off. He was _the worst_!” You emphasize. “He’s stuffy, self-absorbed and he liked to pretend we weren’t dating whenever we were around our colleagues.”

“What a dick!” Holtzmann says in disbelief that anyone with the opportunity to date Erin Gilbert would blow it.

“Precisely.” You agree and try not to be seen as you lift your head back up but it’s too late and Phil notices you as he and his date head to their table not too far from yours and Holtzmann’s.

“Erin! What a coincidence that we’d both end up here on a Friday night.” Phil says as he greets you with his stuffy smile.

“Right. Of _all_ the places in the city…” You say in an amused tone.

Phil steps to the side to show off his date. “Erin, you know Martha from the literature department, right?” 

“I don’t actually.” You say honestly.

“Oh! Well Martha and I are dating.” Phil announces proudly. You hate how he thinks you care about who he’s dating even an entire year after you’ve broken up with him. “And I see you’re here with a friend…” He looks Holtzman over very quickly before turning his gaze back to you.

You don’t know if it’s the stupid look on his face that does it or just the memory of the awful way he treated you when you were dating but in the moment you act completely on impulse.

“Actually Phil, this is Holtzmann... _My girlfriend_.” You say and don’t have time to take it back now. You give Holtzmann a quick glance, hoping she goes along with it and thankfully, she does.

“Good to put a face to your name, Phil.” Holtzmann says, grabbing his hand to shake. “I heard terrible things.” She grins.

Phil’s face changes from smug to surprised. “Oh… I… I didn’t realize Erin--” 

“You did realize I what, Phil?” You ask.

“Nothing. Uh Martha, let’s go to our table.” Phil says and walks away with his date following behind him.

You wait until he’s out of earshot and let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. “I am so sorry. I didn't mean to rope you into that-- I shouldn’t have. I just cannot stand his smug attitude.” 

“Hey, it’s okay. I didn’t mind. Plus did you see his face? Hilarious!” Holtzmann laughs.

“Yeah that was pretty satisfying.” You giggle and nod. “You sure you’re not bothered?”

“Nah, what is there to be bothered about? I got to be your fake girlfriend for a minute. Took me back to all the times I was your fake wife.” Holtzmann chuckles softly. “Good times!”

You blush a bit. “Indeed they were.” You say, making Holtzmann smile. 

  
  


The food is delicious and you almost forget about the unpleasantness of Phil being here until you cross paths with him on your way out of the restroom mid-way through dinner. 

“You know, Erin. I think it’s great you’ve come out. Now I get why you were never really interested in me when we dated.” Phil says confidently, as if he’s got it all figured out.

You want to smack him but you don’t want to give him the satisfaction of getting to you.

“Sure, Phil. If that's what you need to believe to help you sleep at night.” You roll your eyes and move past him to head back to your table. You try not to show your annoyance from the encounter but Holtzmann catches it anyway.

“You okay?” She asks.

You sigh. “I’m fine, sorry. He just irks me so bad. I shouldn’t let him get to me and ruin our date.” 

“Hey, no date of ours will be ruined if I can help it.” Holtzmann says before smirking. “But I have a pretty solid idea of how we can ruin his if you’re up for it.”

You don’t know what Holtzmann is up to and quite frankly you’re a little scared to know but even more than that, you’re curious.

“I’m intrigued…” You say slowly.

Holtzmann’s smirk widens and she talks you through her idea which might just be crazy enough to work.

* * *

With Phil looking over at your table every now and then as you and Holtzmann finish your dinner, you’re only more excited for the plan to come into fruition. You don’t exactly know how Holtz is going to go about it but you sit back and prepare to go along with whatever does and you are not at all prepared for everything that happens.

With the light chatter and soft background music in the restaurant, Holtzmann takes advantage of the quiet ambience to get everyone’s attention by tapping a fork to her wine glass and raising a toast.

“Hello, everyone. I know you don’t know me but I am Jillian Holtzmann and tonight, I want to invite you all to join me in a toast to the most incredible woman I know.” She says as she stands and gestures to you. “Erin, you are as bright and beautiful as the stars that bring light to the darkest of places. Without you I am nothing and with you I am whole.” Holtzmann gets down on her knee in front of you and pulls her Screw-U necklace out from her pocket and holds it out to you. “Will you please make me the luckiest person alive and marry me?”

You’re in a bit of a state of shock, not from the proposal because that was all part of the plan but from how real and believable Holtzmann made it look to onlookers. Judging by the look on Phil’s face as you glance over, he seems to be buying it just like everyone else in the restaurant.

“Yes!” You nod and pull Holtzmann up to hug her, really adding to the “show” and she spins you around happily. She places the necklace around your neck and hugs you again as the patrons and staff around you cheer. You spot Phil tossing bills on the table and walking out with his date and now you’re the one to smile smugly.

“I think that worked out better than I imagined.” Holtzmann says, you’re both still wrapped up in a hug.

“I agree.” You grin, basking in the hug while it lasts.

* * *

The restaurant gives you a dessert on the house to celebrate your engagement. You and Holtzmann split the chocolate lava cake and laugh the whole time at what you managed to pull off. Holtzmann insists on paying this time when the bill comes and does so. You’re already feeling the disappointment of the date coming to an end because once again, Holtzmann has managed to make it incredible. 

The two of you head out of the restaurant together, walking side by side. The night air is chilly and you shiver a bit. Holtzmann catches it and immediately shrugs out of her jacket to put it around your shoulders. The jacket itself but also the smell of Holtzmann brings you warmth.

“Holtz, thank you so much. Tonight was really amazing.” You say honestly, smiling at Holtzmann. 

“Aw Er, I had the best time with you. I always have the best time whenever I see you.” Holtzmann says softly and buries her hands in the pockets of her pants in a comfort move.

“Oh I almost forgot…” You say and clutch the necklace on your chest, reaching behind you to take it off. “I believe this belongs to you.” You say and walk closer to her, close enough that you’re standing face to face. You hold up the necklace and look to her eyes for permission to put it back on her. She nods and you bite your bottom lip as you reach forward and put the necklace back on her and then move back, just slightly to check it out. Holtzmann watches your lips the entire time. “There.” You say, still standing close.

“Thanks.” Holtzmann says breathlessly and doesn’t remove her eyes from your lips. Your own gaze lands on her lips too. 

“Um, you have a little chocolate--” You start but are cut off with Holtzmann’s lips against your own in a kiss so electric it could power the earth. You waste no time returning the kiss, wrapping your arms around her shoulders and her arms wrap around your waist. You don’t know how long you kiss for but you only stop when you both need air. You’re still wrapped around each other and breathe heavily as you stare into each other’s eyes while you catch your breath.

“Did I uh… is the chocolate gone?” Holtzmann asks.

“Huh?” You ask, forgetting for a moment what Holtzmann is talking about. “Uh yeah, I think so.” You say though there was never really any chocolate on Holtz’s mouth.

“Good though maybe we should do that again just in case you missed any.” Holtzmann says and this time you go in for the kiss first since she beat you to it before.

You both smile into the kiss and afterwards when you pull away again and again when she takes your hand in her own and holds it the whole time she walks you back home. 

As you make it to your doorstep, you think back to the disappointment you felt earlier in the restaurant when the date was almost over. Now that disappointment is replaced with excitement as you pull Holtzmann inside of your apartment with you and the two of you make the most of the night together with a promise of many more dates to come.

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yell at me on Twitter: @getwiigywithit


	7. And one.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one time she actually does...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You might need to get dental work after this finale chapter because it’s so sweet it’ll rot your teeth. 
> 
> I’m back from the dead (again). Pandemic brain combined with writers block brain really did a number on me but I have FINALLY finished this fic. Thank you so much to everyone that’s given it a chance, a kudos, a comment. I love this ship more than I love myself and it makes me happy to know that there are still people living and loving Holtzbert.
> 
> If you like this chapter (or hate it), please leave a comment below. Feedback is good for the soul, even when it’s constructive. I hope you’re all taking care of yourselves in these tough times. 
> 
> Enjoy!

You’re in the middle of the lobby of an abandoned hospital, trembling with adrenaline as you and your teammates have just taken down not one but  _ ten  _ Class Four malevolent entities with an ease that comes naturally now after you all saved New York City,  _ and possibly the world _ , from hundreds of them just one year ago. 

With your foot on the ghost trap, you watch as Erin,  _ your girlfriend _ , wrestles the last of the spirits in her beam toward the trap with a look of determination on her face. 

She hoots excitedly after successfully capturing the ghost and you don’t think she’s ever looked more beautiful, even with the remnants of ectoplasm that sits in her hair. She’s grinning as she tries to catch her breath and from across the lobby you can hear Patty cheering and Abby cheer her on. Erin giggles and takes a bow, displaying a level of confidence that had been hiding under tweed suits and impractical heels for years. This is Erin in her truest form. Erin Gilbert completely and authentically herself and you couldn’t possibly be more in love with her. 

You pull her to you by the straps of her pack and smash your lips together. The kiss only lasts a few seconds but it’s enough to leave Erin breathless and with a slight dazed look on her face when you pull away.

“What was that for?” She asks with a small smile playing at her lips. 

“I love you.” You say and it’s not the first time but Erin still blushes and her eyes meet yours to confirm the sincerity of your words just like she did when you said them for the first time one year ago. 

“I love you too.” Erin breathes and her smile is brighter than any beam your inventions could conjure up. She lifts the trap in one hand and takes your hand in the other and you marvel at how perfectly they fit together as you head out to the Ecto-2. 

Usually after a successful bust you’re insistent on driving and blasting your never ending playlist of 80’s classics but today you’re content with handing the keys over to Patty  _ (much to her relief)  _ and sliding in the backseat next to your girlfriend. You scoot next to her and lean your head on her shoulder, not caring in the slightest if you get ectoplasm in your own hair. Erin sighs softly, and leans her atop yours while Abby and Patty sit in the front, lost in their own conversation about an episode of Game of Thrones. 

You quietly take it all in. You're surrounded by your best friends— no, your  _ family  _ and the woman you’re in love with. The woman who loves you too. 

She tells you when you share sleepy kisses in the mornings. She tells you when you bring her a slice of pizza when she gets so lost in her work that she misses lunch. She tells you with tears in her eyes after a Class Five spector sends you flying down a flight of stairs, causing you to break two of your ribs. She tells you when you kiss down the column of her throat during your lovemaking. She tells you when you make her laugh, she tells you after you argue, she tells you when she’s afraid and you hold her, she tells you when you say it or before you say it and sometimes for no reason at all. She loves you and you love her and you think that might’ve been something you’ve known all your life or at least for as long as you’ve known Erin Gilbert. 

You peek up at her and watch as she stares out the window with a content smile on her face. The face you want to wake up to everyday and fall asleep next to every night for the rest of your life.

You must get lost in your thoughts because Erin’s lips are moving but you can’t hear what she’s saying. 

“Huh?” You ask, snapping out of your daze. 

“I said you’re uncharacteristically quiet today. Are you feeling alright?” Erin asks softly, her face slightly concerned. 

“Marry me.” You blurt out. 

“What?” Erin lets out a mixture of a laugh and a breath.

“Marry me.” You repeat a little louder this time and sit up to look at Erin properly, a smile on your lips.

The randomness of the question, or rather,  _ idea _ causes even Patty and Abby’s conversation to come to a halt, the Ecto-2 skidding to a stop on the side of a thankfully empty road.

“W-what?” Erin asks again, still trying to figure out whether or not you’re joking. 

“Marry me.” You say again, still smiling. 

“Holtz, if this is a joke, it’s not funny.” Erin warns. 

You can register the shock on her face and the nerves in her voice and a small part of you worries that she may be preparing to let you down or even run, but the bigger part of you is so sure in this moment that there’s no better time to ask then right now because you’ve asked Erin to marry you five times before but this time, you want it to be real and  _ forever _ . 

“Erin Gilbert, buster of ghosts, enthusiast of tiny bows, light of my life, I have never been more serious about anything in my whole life.” You say sincerely. Patty and Abby are now watching the both of you from the rearview mirror, not wanting to intrude on this moment but also not wanting to miss a second of it. 

“Jill…” Erin says breathlessly, fully realizing how serious you are now. 

You can see her eyes start to well up with tears and you’re starting to feel a little nervous. Words have never been your forté but you could probably write a million proclamations of your love for Erin Gilbert. You just need the courage to recite  _ one _ right now. You take Erin’s hands in your own and a steadying breath to ground yourself.

“Erin, I never imagined that I’d be proposing to you in the back of a hearse though if I’m being honest, it’s completely on brand for lil ol’ me…” 

You can hear Patty and Abby quietly chuckle and nod their agreement in the front but you don’t tear your eyes away from Erin’s. 

“I don’t have a ring to give you or champagne to pop because I didn’t exactly wake up this morning with the plan to propose to you today and certainly not like this but I knew from the very beginning that I wanted to be your wife. I think the five times I already proposed to you would help support that statement.” You grin cheekily and Erin lets out a wet chuckle. “Er, I don’t think it’s a coincidence that even after several years apart, we kept finding our way back to each other. Maybe I’m crazy—“

“ _ Or _ it’s just fate.” Erin interrupts you with a smile, echoing the very words you said to her in the back of an uber some time ago during one of your chance meetings.

Your grin widens. “ _ Definitely _ fate.” You agree and continue. “I believe that we were always meant to be in each other’s lives and I don’t want another ten years to go by for me to ask you to marry me again. I want this time to be the last time and I want it to be for real and  _ forever _ . So, Erin Gilbert, will you marry me?”

“Yes. Yes, of course. Yes.” Erin cries out and tugs you in for a kiss by the collar of your coveralls. It’s all teeth and tears because neither of you can stop smiling or giggling as Abby and Patty cheer and wipe their own tears away in the front seat. 

This may not have been the proposal either of you dreamed of but it doesn’t matter because it’s perfect anyway. 

  
  


Patty drives you all the rest of the way to the firehouse where the four of you celebrate with pizza, wine and Kevin who seems to have thought you and Erin were already married. 

Yours and Erin’s celebration continues when you get back to your apartment and can’t seem to take your hands off each other. 

“Let’s consummate this thing!” You say as you toss her tank top across the room. 

Erin snorts and then gasps as your lips latch onto the part of her neck that makes her toes curl. “Consummation happens after the wedding.” She breathes out in a soft moan. 

“Well then we have plenty of time for practice.” You grin and resume making love to your fiancé who very eagerly returns your affections.

  
  


Patty and Abby very enthusiastically accept the roles of Maid of Honor and Best Woman. Where Patty is helpful with details, Abby keeps you and Erin sane as you venture into wedding planning for a real wedding this time. 

The first thing on your list is to find Erin a ring and you already know exactly the kind of ring you’re looking for, if only finding it was easy. It takes you two months and about seventeen different shops until you find it. When you do, you nearly cry at how much it resembles the plastic one you presented Erin with in front of your seventh grade home economics class. Once you had found out that Erin kept it after all these years, you knew for sure this small piece of plastic held a promise of many,  _ many _ more years to come. 

You give the real ring to Erin a few nights later during a picnic on the rooftop of the firehouse. You hand her the plastic one first that you  _ may _ or  _ may not _ have taken without her permission before you present her with the real thing. She cries and vows to keep both forever. She also surprises you with a ring she had secretly bought with Abby. The stone in the middle is yellow like the tint in your glasses and when she slips it on your finger, it’s a perfect fit. 

  
  


The wedding comes together in just three short months. You and Erin had agreed on a small and simple ceremony and Patty did an incredible job organizing just that in the most beautiful way possible. The firehouse lobby is almost unrecognizable as it’s set up with meticulously placed floral arrangements and fairy lights. 

You gape as you enter the firehouse early that afternoon holding your suit in a garment bag sling over your shoulder. 

“Pattycakes, if you weren’t such a damn good Ghostbuster, I’d seriously vouch for you to get into the wedding planning business.” 

Patty chuckles. “Thanks, baby. Now you head to the locker room and I’ll be right there to help you get ready.”

“Oh, I was actually gonna get ready up in the—“

“Nu-uh. I ain’t lettin’ your crazy ass anywhere near the lab today. You got another thing comin’ if you think I’m gonna let you blow somethin’ up after I spent all night setting this up.” 

“Alriiight.” You chuckle softly and head in the direction of the locker room. Patty shakes her head as she watches you go but you catch her smiling as you walk away. You know that she’d do this all over again for you in a heartbeat if she had to. She’s your Best Woman after all. 

  
  


You look in the mirror at yourself in your perfectly tailored suit that has even asexual Abby ready to marry you. Your heart thuds heavily in your chest the closer the time gets to the start of the ceremony. The anticipation has you shaking and it’s only when you get a text from your fiancé that your smile isn’t twitching with nerves for the first time that day. 

_ Erin: 24 hours was a really long time without you. I’m starting to regret the fact we didn’t just elope. _

You chuckle to yourself and type a reply. 

_ You: Aw but then you wouldn’t get to see me in this suit I’m wearing.  _

_ Erin: True. I can’t wait.  _

_ You: Neither can I.  _

_ Erin: God how did we last years without each other? _

_ You: I don’t know but thankfully after today, we’ll have forever together.  _

_ Erin: Forever. <3 _

You smile at the response and Patty comes in to ask if you’re ready. You nod, having never been more ready for anything in your whole life. Or so you thought because nothing — _ nothing—  _ could have prepared you for the way your heart skips the second your eyes land on Erin at the end of the aisle. There are no words, in any language, that can describe exactly how breathtaking Erin Gilbert looks as she walks down the aisle in her form fitting white gown. You make no efforts to hold back your tears as your soon-to-be wife approaches you. When she’s finally close enough for you to take her hands in your own, you can see her own tear streaks and you lift your thumbs to wipe them from her cheeks. Erin had the same idea and so when you reach up, your arms collide a bit causing the both of you and all of your guests to laugh. 

When the laughter dies down, Erin looks at you with that smile that makes you fall in love with her over and over again. 

“You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” She whispers to you with a sincerity that makes you want to cry all over again. 

“I think you’ve got me beat but we can call it even otherwise we’ll be here all night.” You say with a chuckle. 

Jennifer Lynch clears her throat to get you both to focus so she can get on with officiating the ceremony. Your vows are personal and beautiful and you each only get a few lines in before you’re both ugly crying. When you're officially pronounced married, you holler in excitement and pull Erin,  _ your wife _ , in for a kiss that seals your forever together. 

  
  


The rooftop reception is every bit as beautiful as the wedding itself and neither you or Erin can stop smiling the entire time. 

The two of you find a moment to sneak away together and find yourselves snuggled together, hand in hand, on the couch that sits in your lab. 

“So what’s next for us?” Erin asks, looking up at you with nothing but love in her eyes. 

“Whatever we want.” You respond softly. “We have the rest of our lives to figure it out. Have anything particular in mind?” 

“Well I was thinking we could start with…” Erin starts before leaning closer to you to whisper in your ear. 

Your eyes widen comically and you sit up quickly, pulling your  _ wife _ to her feet. “I’m sure Patty and Abby won’t mind if we leave now.” You lift your giggling wife up into your arms and carry her in the direction of the stairs, ready for the beginning of the rest of your life.  _ Together _ . 

Fin. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t have a personal event to compare any of the events in this chapter to. I just want to name that I have a HoRo (hopeless romantic, emphasis on hopeless). Bye!


End file.
